Sex & Dating Sweet Nothings Striptease Find a valentine who also appreciates the female form at this burlesque-performance-cum-singles-mixer.
Gay Dykes on Mics
Amy Beckerman and Leah Dubie present another installment of their biweekly comedy show, with Jamie Lee, Cara Kilduff, RG Daniels and Gloria Bigelow.
Theater Venus in Fur
This David Ives stage adaptation of an erotic-lit classic is not only smart and funny, it features the dynamite debut of goofball seductress Nina Arianda.
Music A Celebration of the Life of Joe Maneri
One of the most poignant jazz saxophonists ever is feted at the Irondale Center by his violist son, Mat, as well as improv heavyweights such as Barre Phillips and Joe McPhee.
Music Them Crooked Vultures
The supergroup of Stone Age Queen Josh Homme, Foo Fighter Dave Grohl and Led Zeppelin bassist John Paul Jones brings ballsy, infectious rock back to NYC.
It’s your perfect Super Bowl Sunday today with Super Bowl XLIV kickoff at Brooklyn Bowl and the School of Sex’s new swinger party More to Love: Super Bowl party (yes, you can get busy and watch the Super Bowl).
Alternately, today could also be your perfect get-me-the-hell-away-from-this-moronic-game Sunday at the start of the Museum of the City of New York’s Chinese New Year celebrations with Jennifer 8. Lee. And who cares about the sports stars on the field when you see the lineup of DJs and performers at the Dance Marathon for Haiti Relief.
Then there’s also the stand-up of Donnell Rawlings, the nerdcore musical stylings of MC Frontalot and the tasty treats at Cupcake Cabaret. Totally advert free, it’s your perfect Sunday.
Follow your perfect Saturday down the rabbit hole to Alice in Wonderland Draw-a-Thon Theater to sketch “nude maniac” models retelling Lewis Carroll’s iconic fantasy.
If you prefer an activity where all the participants wear clothes, and lots of them, bundle up and head to Winter Jam in Central Park for free fun in the snow (real or artificial, depending on the weather). To warm up after being exposed to the elements, try a traditional Japanese makanai ryori feast at EN Japanese Brasserie.
Need some music to polish off your day? Get down at the Target First Saturdays Mardi Gras party with a performance by Haitian band DJA-Rara, or check out the U.S. debut of supergroup the Moritz von Oswald Trio at the Unsound Festival.
Don’t pop the blue pill or the red pill, take your perfect Saturday and do not operate heavy machinery (because it’s your day off).
Your perfect Friday is a big Lou Reed fan, so it’ll be heading to see the feisty Fireworks Ensemble perform his 75-minute wall-of-sound distortion onslaught Metal Machine Music. To complete a day of experimental art, pick something up from the Outsider Art Fair to establish your outré credentials, and select a period-specific garment from the Manhattan Vintage Clothing Show.
Alternately, just party down at the Bronx Museum’s free Looking for the Perfect Beat: A Tribute to J Dilla, or at the last of the Guggenheim’s Art After Dark series with electrofunk by Chromeo. Or screw the museums and go to the BAM Opera House to see Ra Ra Riot + The Antlers performing in the Sounds Like Brooklyn music festival. It’s such a perfect Friday.
Music Chicha Libre
Craziness abounds as the psychedelic sounds of the Peruvian underclass accompany two Charlie Chaplin shorts.
Party A Day at the Beach Bikini Burlesque Bash
Sip tropical-themed drink specials as the ladies of Wasabassco Burlesque shimmy and Moto Gators get you groovin’ to surf-rock tunes.
Eat Out Do What You Love
Find out if 2010 is the year to launch your food career at this inspirational panel discussion, featuring Top Chef star Tom Colicchio (pictured) and chocolatier Jacques Torres.
Drink Up Meet the Brewer
Beer nerds can schmooze with Wolaver’s/Otter Creek brewer Mike Gerhart when he brings 17 organic drafts and casks to the taps at Blind Tiger.
Lecture “Valentine’s Day 101: Why Humans Have Sex”
Psychologist David M. Buss(Why Women Have Sex) will shed some light on the strategies of human mating from a scientific standpoint, which may help you decipher urban dating codes. Here’s hoping.
Music Statik Selektah
A Massachusetts hip-hop producer hits S.O.B.’s with a posse of indie rappers, including Consequence and Freeway.
Books “Publishing in the Age of Blah Blah Blah…”
This is the second installment in a series of talks in which writers and editors discuss the state of the publishing industry.
Viewing party Lost season-six-premiere party
Tribute band Previously on Lost will perform a “recap,” while Lost-themed drink specials will have you slap-happy by the time the opening credits roll.
Drinking events Discover French Wines
Learn about the Côte de Nuits and the Côte de Beaune regions with Bar Boulud sommelier Michael Madrigale at the beginning of this six-part tasting series.
Talk Wallace Shawn with Anthony Arnove
Actor and playwright Wallace Shawn (of, yes, The Princess Bride, among many other movies) and editor Anthony Arnove discuss writing and creativity.
Spend your perfect Sunday mourning Gidget Chipperton by gorging yourself on tacos at the Brooklyn Taco Experiment. (It’s what she would have wanted.) And spend your perfect Sunday morning at a Ten Buck brunch. (It’s what we all want.)
The rest of your day should, nay must, be spent in the service of others (while having fun) planting trees and drinking eco-wines at the Tu B’shvat Winter Garden celebration, or laughing your ass off at the Beyond Funderdome Comedy Blowout or MERCYCAT—raising money for the Off Broadway production The Diary of a Teenage Girl and Mercy Corps respectively.
For two great ways to help Haiti, take your good self over to your perfect Sunday.
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Do not fear paper tigers on your perfect Saturday, although after seeing Chris Gilmour’s The Triumph of Good and Evil at “Slash: Paper Under the Knife” you are perfectly within your rights to fear incredibly lifelike paper dragons.
Show no fear today by participating in The Idiotarod, a shopping-cart race that is taking place somewhere, at some time (remember to show a healthy fear of the police though).
If you fear where our country is headed, get informed at the Brooklyn Museum’s panel analyzing President Obama’s performance so far in “One Year On.” To get over your myriad fears, employ Dutch courage at the NY State brewers tasting.
Remember, there is nothing to fear but fear itself—oh, and the fear of not taking advantage of your perfect Saturday.
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With its jeans hanging halfway down its ass, your perfect Friday kick-flips its way into your life with “Ramp It Up: Skateboard Culture in Native America,” a free exhibit showing the joie de vivre of skate culture on reservations.
Your perfect Friday is also all about musical takeoffs, both professional—bands cover MJ at Dangerous: All Metal Tribute to Michael Jackson—and amateur—at the Hip-Hop Karaoke Championship. But of course, as always, the Vivian Girls do their own thing at the start of the Sounds Like Brooklyn music festival.
Finally, take your pick of cinematic delights as a restored version of landmark ’70s queer film Word Is Out starts a week-long run at Anthology Film Archives, and Maysles Cinema in Harlem screens Funk Lessons and holds a dance party at Get Down and Party. Together! And of course, Mad Mel loses it, this time in Edge of Reason.
With a passion for music, film and skateboarding, your perfect Friday sounds like a perfect date.
Books A Literary Magazine Salon
Grab a cocktail in celebration of three literary magazines (One Story, jubilat and A Public Space) and the writers who contribute to them. Authors including Terese Svoboda (Trailer Girl and Other Stories) and Cathy Park Hong (Dance Dance Revolution) will delight us with their literary stylings.
Music The Ventures at B.B. King Blues Club & Grill
Rock’s longest-running, best-selling instrumental act is currently celebrating its induction into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame. About time! Get up close and personal with these guitar stars in the relatively intimate environs of B.B. King’s.
Clubs Blkmarket Membership & Luna City Express
Prepare to break it down when Blkmarket Membership’s Taimur and Fahad bring their underground-electronics hoedown to Santos Party House. Luna City Express’s Marco Resmann will stop by to deliver some sensuously jacking deep house from the recently released Hello from Planet Earth.
Eat Out Oyster Night at Jimmy’s No. 43
Northeast oyster growers will compete in a friendly shuck-off before discussing the bivalve business and the plight of wild oysters on Long Island. A cool $20 gets you in and scores you a sampler plate (two Peconic Pearls, two Mystics) with a Sixpoint pairing to wash it down.
Moth founder George Dawes Green (Photo by Eric H. Brown)
Benefit Haiti Fund-Raiser at the Bell House
Party for a cause and catch performances by Jimmy Fallon, the Walkmen, A.C. Newman of the New Pornographers and many more. 100 percent of the proceeds will go to Save the Children and Partners in Health.
Event The Moth GrandSLAM
The best storytellers in NYC will gather at Highline Ballroom for this semiannual event, which features participants who have won at previous Moth StorySLAMs. Comedian Dan Kennedy will play host.
Music The Necks at the Old American Can Factory
Formed in Sydney in the late ’80s, this Aussie trio specializes in an austere yet highly sensual brand of minimalism—funky and even psychedelic, yet without a hint of jammy excess. Don’t miss this rare local appearance by a band that can really alter your headspace.
Film Soul Train Documentary Screening & Discussion
This event will definitely have you feelin’ groovy: The Paley hosts a special screening of VH1’s new documentary Soul Train: The Hippest Trip in America, about the landmark music show. Postscreening, musicians and experts, including ?uestlove of the Roots, will discuss the show’s influence.
Dance Opening-Night Benefit: Cool New York 2010 Dance Festival
White Wave will hold a fund-raiser (7pm, tickets $30) in honor of its seventh annual winter dance showcase. The festival runs through February 7 and features 60 companies and choreographers, including DiMauro/DiMauro Dance, Nejla Y. Yatkin/NY2 Dance, and Neville Dance Theatre.
Drink Up Australia Day Celebrations
Celebrate Britain’s colonization of Australia in the time-honored expat fashion—with red meat and excessive drinking—at Aussie party spots Bondi Road and the Sunburnt Cow.
Concert .357 Lover at Knitting Factory Brooklyn
Led by local longhair belter Corn Mo—21st-century Brooklyn’s answer to Meat Loaf—.357 Lover offers gloriously hammy rock-opera-style goodness.
Live Radio Too Beautiful to Live
Luke Burbank brings a live version of his popular Seattle radio show to Brooklyn’s Union Hall tonight; advance tickets are already sold out, so show up early.
Lecture “Longshots and Underdogs” New York Times columnist Bob Herbert and New Yorker writer Adam Gopnik discuss the most amazin’ comebacks in sports history at the New-York Historical Society.
Sports J.P. Morgan Tournament of Champions
Catch people hitting tiny little balls in Grand Central Terminal during this annual squash tourney.
Event The 2010 Nightlife Awards
Cabaret impresario Scott Siegel welcomes an array of musical and comedic talents to the seventh annual Nightlife Awards, bestowed by the city’s critics on New York’s finest nightclub talent.
Film The Devils
Ken Russell’s brilliant, blasphemous masterpiece tells the tale of 17th-century witch hunts, nun-filled orgies and a nutso Oliver Reed.
Lecture Governor Mario Cuomo
92nd Street Y kicks off its new Lecture of My Life series tonight with an appearance by former New York governor Mario Cuomo.
Comedy Gravid Water
Trained actors, who’ve memorized their lines, take the stage with top improvisers, who’ve never before seen their scenes.
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TONY hearts Chris March, you heart Chris March, your perfect Sunday hearts Chris March. Thank goodness there’s a book for that, I Heart Chris March, which is released today. Go crush on the Marchster.
Since you’re a TONY reader, we also know you love to travel. Cover some ground today on your steed on the Frostbite Ride to Astoria, Queens, and book it a little further to the free food tasting in Long Island City: Edible Queens Winter Warm-Up. If you prefer locomotion that doesn’t rely on your pedaling power, purchase an unlimited MetroCard and take the Subway Art and Architecture tour.
Finally, there are three benefits for the victims of the earthquake in Haiti tonight: Song, Dance and Love for Haiti at Cielo; The World Stands with Haiti at Drom; and one of a four-night string of benefits at City Winery, Support Haiti: Rosanne Cash + Madeleine Peyroux + Nada Surf + Tabou Combo.
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Begin your perfect Saturday with an art trifecta, starting with “Power and Presence: Theo Westenberger’s Portraits of Extraordinary Women.” Then take a walk with your camera on the Heart of the Park Photo Trek in Central Park. Finish off with the five-star Martin Wong show “Everything Must Go.”
Now that you’ve gotten culture out of the way, discard your spectacles and pull on your party pants and, well, party. Dance on the (imminent) grave of Monkey Town with Double Dirty Dancing, followed by The Brooklyn Revue, or catch DJ Pauly D at the Jersey Shore Theme Party before he marries Britney or does something else equally mind-boggling. Check out more options to let your hair down instead of gelling it up in your perfect Saturday.
Your perfect Friday is doing its bit for others, just like two concerts that will help improve our collective lot (and your weekend). The first is Nothing, A Benefit for Tuli Kupferberg, featuring luminaries like Lou Reed. The second is ¿Real Bushwick/Bushwick Réal?, with the rhyming talents of Nine 11 Thesaurus.
Keep that clenched fist raised—another group is striking back at the cultural tyranny of animals. Yeah, that’s right, it’s the Art for the People benefit party, sticking it to the mammal with a performance by Colorform.
Over at Cielo, Dubtribe Sound System will be sticking the candles on the club’s seventh birthday cake, while “Never Can Say Goodbye,” a pop-up art space and venue in the old Tower Records, attempts to metaphorically pull out the digital knife the Internet stuck in the record store’s back with a throwback exhibition. (Psst: Hide your iPod earbuds before you go in.) For one day only, your perfect Friday is in analog.
Comedy Jenny Slate: Dead Millionaire
This infectious SNL player makes time for a final performance of her one-person show in New York.
Eat Out How Fat Became a Four Letter Word
Author Jennifer McLagan explains how lipids got a bad rap, and shares some of the benefits of eating them.
Talks “Above the Law: VIPs and Accountability”
Manson prosecutor Vincent Bugliosi and author Naomi Wolf discuss the double standard for celebrity troublemakers.
Books The Rumpus Anniversary Party
This online lit mag celebrates its first birthday with readings from founder Stephen Elliott (The Adderall Diaries) and others.
Dance David Zambrano
In Soul Project, Zambrano explores the soul in all of its manifestations.
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