Do trivia contests leave you cold? Do you lack the will to memorize seemingly meaningless minutiae? Well, perhaps we have the question-based drinking activity for you. As a TONY reader you will have thoroughly explored the city, and that’s all the experience you need to triumph at the NYC Trivia Rumble, run by the Lower East Side History Project at the Bowery Poetry Club.

If you’re able to answer questions like “On which lower-Manhattan bridge does the bike trail run through the center?,” you could win discounts to local museums, books and, most importantly, bragging rights.

You can compete with a group or own your own, but you must be there at 6pm sharp with the minimum suggested donation of $6. If you can’t get out of work on time, you can always challenge yourself by following the quiz online. Make us proud.

Now that the detritus of Halloween has been cleared away, it’s time to gear up for the prime romantic opportunities of the holiday season. Gentlemen, begin your training today with a grand gesture in Times Square. At 4pm, anyone with a trench coat in his wardrobe and a song in his heart (preferably Peter Gabriel’s “In Your Eyes”) can show up at the red TKTS Booth’s stairs (47th St and Broadway) to re-create John Cusack’s iconic “boom box scene” from 1989’s Say Anything. The first 75 impersonators to show up will receive a free copy of the 20th anniversary DVD of the film, but it’s safe to say that all attendees have a shot at YouTube fame with a stunt like this. Just watch out for the swooning tourists—I ain’t saying she’s a visa digger, but she ain’t messing with no unnaturalized residents!

For those who don’t have time to stand around looking lovelorn in Times Square in the middle of the afternoon (where are your priorities?), there’s something for you too. It’s similarly old-school, but in a more wholesome and infinitely less sexy sort of way. At 7pm, The Bell House kicks off the first round of “The World’s Biggest Connect Four Championship” ($3 to play, free to watch), which will continue for—you guessed it—four consecutive Tuesdays this month and culminate with the crowning of Brooklyn’s Connect Four king on November 24. Themed vodka drinks are on the house from 7 to 8pm, and well drinks and select pints will be four bucks the rest of the night. E-mail connectfour@thebellhouseny.com to register.

Image via imdb.com.

Twitter founder Jack Dorsey

The prospect of watching two people tweet may sound like a terrible dinner with your friends who work in PR, but context is key. Tonight at the Rubin Museum of Art, Twitter founder Jack Dorsey will tweet back and forth with Jungian psychoanalyst Dogulas G. Tompkins, who will use the technology to pry into his subject’s dreams and memories—140 characters at a time. The tweets will be projected onto a screen for the audience to read, and they’ll be mixed in with responses from other Twitter users following the conversation.

Questions abound: Will it be awkward? (Probably.) Will Tompkins draw out the inner secrets of the entrepreneurial mind? Will Dorsey momentarily forget himself and type “feeling a bit gassy—hope no one notices ;)”? And what if the dreaded “fail whale” rears its ugly head and publicly embarrasses the head Twit? The point is, anything could happen.

The event kicks off at 7pm, but get there early because the $25 ticket (students $7) includes admission to “The Red Book of C.G. Jung” and all other museum exhibitions before the tweeting begins. And if the convo begins to falter, hightail it down to Comix for more Twitter fun: Michael Ian Black, Michael Showalter, and other comedians will be on hand to celebrate the launch of new comedic-tweet aggregator WitStream ($15 plus two-drink minimum).

Image via rmanyc.org.

Photographs 1 to 12: Jolie Ruben

Movember is almost upon us. No, that’s not lax copyediting, it’s a global campaign asking men to grow a mustache in November to raise funds for and awareness of prostate and testicular cancers. It’s pretty simple: Shave at the start of the month, grow a mustache (rules after the jump), get sponsored, have a party at the end of the month. A few brave souls sacrificed their facial hair this morning, and we were there to capture it. We’ve also tacked on some fine examples of whiskers from last year to inspire you.

Head to movember.com to sign up, and no excuses. Don’t have a razor? Get yourself down to sponsor Dermalogica in Soho (110 Grand Street between Broadway and Mercer St, 212-219-9800) between 6pm and 9pm to bag complimentary amenity kits and gift cards. Can’t grow a mustache? You can join us as contenders in the “lamest mustache” competition at the closing party. Click past the jump for the grooming rules in full. Read more »

Imagine a comedy bill featuring Jeff Foxworthy, Bernie Mac, Eddie Izzard, Steve Martin and Andrew Dice Clay. Now imagine that it was taking place in the intimate Bowery Poetry Club (308 Bowery between Bleecker and E Houston Sts; 212-614-0505, bowerypoetry.com) and tickets cost only $7, or $5 online. Sounds like the greatest show ever, right?

Tonight at 7pm, check out the second annual “Schtick or Treat” show, where all the above will come to fruition, with one slight modification: None of of those legends will actually be in attendance, but up-and-coming New York comedians will be impersonating them. In fact, there will be more 30 wanna-be kings (and queens) of comedy taking off everyone from Joan Rivers to Carrot Top. If you’re a little ADD, the format should suit you nicely–the comics get three minutes each to bring the ruckus, so they’ll barely have time to wear out their welcome.

To get a sense of what you’re in for, check out the video above for footage of last year’s event. Let’s hope “Bill Cosby” comes back. He killed!

KayCee Wimbish and Owen O'Connor of Awesome Farm

The New York party scene can be great, but sometimes you want to scream, “Bugger this. Just give me some local farm-raised poultry, call in a massive brass band and let’s have ourselves a hoedown!”

If you find yourself in this frame of mind, get in touch with the hinterland at the Brooklyn Lyceum (227 Fourth Ave between President and Union Sts, Park Slope, Brooklyn; brooklynlyceum.com) for the Brooklyn Farmers Ball, happening tonight between 7pm and midnight. Pay what you can between $12 and $25 (”We won’t be asking for your tax return,” says organizer Jen Datka) to enjoy a feast of seasonal produce and chicken from Awesome Farm; listen to live music from Spanglish Fly and the 30-piece Rude Mechanical Orchestra; and learn about Brooklyn’s Urban Agriculture and Food Justice Community. All proceeds benefit the New York Delegation to the Growing Food and Justice Initiative in Milwaukee (learn more at growingfoodandjustice.org).

If you’re into dating foodies, we might venture a guess that a farmers ball is just the place to mix and mingle with some eligible green thumbs. Just be careful: Next thing you know you’ll be packing up a Prius and making your way to Wisconsin, fueled only by love, a dream and copious bags of organic trail mix.

Camp duo Jeffery & Cole improvise "Alice"

It’s Monday, and if you’re like us, you’re probably looking for a rabbit hole to scurry down tonight for some campy, Halloween-flavored fun. Look no further than quirky performance space Glasslands Gallery in Williamsburg, which is hosting a “Mad Hatter tea party” and special 10pm screening of Alice in Wonderland—the classic 1951 version with Kathryn Beaumont.

What makes the screening so special? As the movie plays, Internet celebs and Logo TV stars Jeffery & Cole will be onstage offering their own cheeky commentary. If you dress up (slutty Alice, hobo-style Mad Hatter or creepy Cheshire Cat are our suggestions), you not only get in free, but you also have an open invitation to join in and humiliate yourself in front of strangers delight the crowd with your inimitable wit. (The costume-less pay $2 to get in—not a bad price for saving face.)

Tonight’s event marks the first in a weekly series of interactive film screenings, so watch this space. Next up: The NeverEnding Story!

Enjoy a slice of real New York tonight. The Bowery Mission is celebrating 130 years of serving those in need and the 100-year anniversary of its chapel (227 Bowery between Rivington and Stanton Sts; bowery.org) with a month of free arts programming on Thursdays in October from 7 to 8:30pm. There are images of the iconic street from the 1930s to the present day in “Now & Then: Photography of the Bowery,” and half-hour tours of the Bowery Mission.

Tonight only, there’s a presentation on muckracking journalist, photographer and champion of the poor Jacob Riis, as well as a performance from East Village crooner John Rainbow. Rainbow was a balladeer with a golden voice, but never made it after refusing to change his style to sound like Fats Domino. It’s just one of the stories that makes the Bowery what it is. Expect plenty more like it tonight.

Think of the poor calf who perished to make this whip.

Does the idea of a spot of flagellation tickle you? But maybe you can’t get over the image of the poor calf that died so you could get your jollies from a leather whip? That fear need restrain you no longer! Babeland in Park Slope (where else?) is offering a walk-in class tonight teaching you how to make your own flogger from recycled bike tires.

It’s only $5 for materials, and Babeland’s Leah will guide you through the process and give a nonscary introduction to experimenting with pain. It’s good for cows, it’s good for the planet, it’s great for your wallet, and it’s bad (meaning good?) for your bottom.

The corner bodega is a New York institution, but one must only look at our Greek-coffee-cup-littered streets to see that it’s not pulling its weight in the fight against climate change. Tonight, catch a glimpse of a more sustainable future at BoHo Bodega (220 Lafayette St between Kenmare and Spring Sts, bohobodega.com), a nonprofit pop-up shop offering eco-friendly versions of all the staples you’d expect from your local store (think Kiss My Face lip balm, Divine Chocolate and Sambazon Acai energy drinks). Show up between 8 and 10pm (be sure to mention TONY at the door if it’s busy) to check out the products and sample free food and drinks while local DJs spin tunes and an “urban opera” unfolds right in your midst.

The green bodega—which bills itself as the first of its kind—stays open until Saturday and has a whole slate of free events lined up, including an eco-friendly home gardening seminar (Thu 2:30–3:30pm) and Dixieland jazz over mulled Simply Organic cider (Sat 8–10pm). It all sounds like something we could get used to pretty quickly. But one question remains: How does a green bodega deal with a 3am chicken cutlet order? If they can crack that, we’re totally on board.

When we think of crumbling urban landscapes, our minds tend to wander to Detroit, Baltimore and other cities far beyond our bustling metropolis. But needless to say, New York is not all shiny Frank Gehry buildings and perfect brownstones—vacant buildings dot the five boroughs as well, serving as reminders of industries, families and stories that have come and gone. Photographer and location scout Nathan Kensinger has spent time documenting these relics, and tonight at 7:30pm he’ll share the results in a free lecture at Pete’s Candy Store. “Pretty, Vacant: A Slideshow of Abandoned New York” is an eye-opening (and sublimely beautiful) look at a side of New York most people never see, including the abandoned mansions of Admiral’s Row at the Brooklyn Navy Yard, beached ships littering Dead Horse Bay and the ghostly interiors of the Domino’s Sugar Factory.

Making your own Halloween costume is pretty cool, but is it worth the effort? The question looming over any exertion of effort seems particularly pressing when one considers the realities of cutting fabrics, finding accessories and locating sewing machines. But what if we told you there’s a place you can go that has all of these things on hand, along with on-site experts to help your creation reach its full potential? We think you might change your tune. “Yes we can!” you might say. “Impossible is nothing!”

Tonight from 7 to 11pm, Make Fun Studios at the House of Yes (342 Maujer St between Morgan Ave and Waterbury St, Williamsburg, Brooklyn) hosts a workshop that will fulfill all your DIY Halloween needs. For $20, you’ll get access to all of the studio’s machinery, as well as pattern-making materials and free fabric and trim. Costume-making pros Kae Burke and Tara McManus will be on hand with tips and $5 bins of costume bits and wigs to spruce up your work. And if the process still feels overwhelming when you get there–or your Lady Gaga–style face mask goes horribly wrong—you can still shop for commercial costumes and original designs by Burke and 3rd Earth Designs.

Just remember: When you take your costume back to your apartment, take a good look around and be thankful you didn’t try this at home.

Dumpling hunters, unite! If you haven’t studied up on the best cheap dumplings list, here’s your chance to pack in a quick ’n’ dirty cram session in the category: an autumnal dumpling crawl through Chinatown.

“Spatch,” a self-taught connoisseur of all things dumpling, will lead the way, steering the group to the freshest and cheapest examples of the bite-sized food (all under $2) while sharing a brief history of the jiaozi (pot stickers) and xiao long bao (soup dumplings). She’ll also provide a scorecard and a map to help you keep track of your favorites. Who knows—maybe one day you’ll want to lead your own dumpling crawl, young grasshopper.

To join the crawl, just show up at the Pit at Sara D. Roosevelt Park (Chrystie and Broome Sts) at 6:30pm. The tour will make a beeline for Vanessa’s Dumpling House and then hit four to five other spots within a ten-block radius. It’s pay-as-you-go, so bring a $10 bill and your appetite!

If you’re the shy type, you can do some recon on your fellow crawlers beforehand via the event’s Facebook group.

You’ve been to Park Slope, so you know what hell looks like: pushy, self-righteous parents and their precious progenies. Well, war photographer, author and mother Deborah Copaken Kogan has been permanently consigned to that flaming pit of parenthood and has sent back dispatches in the form of her new book Hell Is Other Parents. Surely it can’t be that bad? Yet Kogan herself has said the day-to-day parenting conflicts sometimes makes her feel like the “playground is a worse battle zone than Afghanistan.”

That may be overly dramatic, but tonight her book gets the dramatic treatment with readings by Tony- and Emmy-nominated actors including Kate Burton (Hedda Gabler), Tovah Feldshuh (Yentl) and Julia Halston (Hairspray). The event starts at 8pm at the Westside Theatre and costs $35; a little steep perhaps, but the money does benefit Planned Parenthood, who are hopefully planning to reduce parenthood in the Slope. Bag your tickets here.

Looking for a cheap, wild night out? Leave it to the guy who calls himself “Broke-Ass Stuart” to put on a party that, from the sound of it, has truly pulled out all the stops. Spectacles like “Amazing Amy the Yoga Contortionist” and “Flame Dancing” make us think Stuart might have a thing for playing ringmaster at his own party. But if you’re willing to be dazzled for a measly $5, then why not indulge the guy?

Stuart Schuffman, “editor-in-cheap” at BrokeAssStuart.com, has published a Broke-Ass guide for both New York and San Francisco, and he has a way of making “young, broke and beautiful” sound like virtues. His recurring Fuck the Recession Party takes place at Rebel (251 W 30th St between Seventh and Eighth Aves; 212-695-2747, rebelnyc.com) tonight, and will feature a unique array of circus performances, clown burlesque (you read that right), DJs and live music. Oh, and did we mention free booze? Yeah, the folks at Broke-Ass are experts on thrifty entertainment. Actually, they’re pretty hard-core. They’ll go digging through the garbage to salvage someone’s 35¢ MetroCard if it brings them 35¢ closer to a free ride. And we thought we were cheap!

Image courtesy of Broke-Ass Stuart

There’s a chill in the air and unexpressed artistry in your soul, so hop the hippest train in town—that’s the L to you, pal— and walk east to the official opening of Six by Six Gallery (531 E 13th St between Aves A and B, 6×6gallery.com), happening tonight from 6 to 8pm.

Whereas most galleries woo visitors to opening night with a glass of warm chardonnay, Six by Six has a fun and innovative trick up its sleeve: For $20, you can pick up a blank six-by-six-inch canvas to art up in any way you see fit. When you’re done, you’ll submit the work, set the price and watch as your mini masterpiece hangs on the gallery wall for one month (and stays online for three).

And the best part? You’ll actually have the chance to make a serious return on your $20 investment. In a show of artist promotion and goodwill, the gallery will give you 80 percent of the profit if your piece is sold.

So what are you waiting for? All awesome and/or enthusiastic artists are encouraged to attend. —Rebecca Katherine Hirsch

Looking for the perfect place to propose? Why not Lincoln Center’s famed Revson Fountain (Josie Robertson Plaza, Columbus Ave between 62nd and 65th Sts; lincolncenter.org), the very same place we watched Dr. Peter Venkman woo Dana Barrett in 1984’s Ghostbusters? You can be a part of history as the revamped waterworks—a year in the making—open to the public today. The new water “choreography” was engineered by WET, the same team that made the Bellagio fountains a fixture on the Las Vegas Strip, and which is currently designing the biggest fountain in the world for the Burj Dubai Skyscraper. What’s more, the architects (Diller Scofidio + Renfro)—who spiced up the Revson with a granite ring, automated wind-spray sensors and special lighting systems—are the masterminds behind our beloved High Line. Which might also be a great place to propose. We’re full of ideas.

Alternatively, if you’re getting psyched for Halloween (and already worrying about your costume), then go back to first-grade art class at Spaceworks (355 Bedford Ave at South 4th St, Williamsburg, Brooklyn; 718-599-2718, spacecraftbrooklyn.com). The eclectic supplies store hosts an evening of costume-making and “local creepy crafter” communing, tonight from 7 to 10pm. For $10, they provide refreshments (punch and beer), a raffle ticket and, of course, clothes.

Just dying to see Zombieland? Would you practically kill for a chance to get into the movie for free? Then get your gray-like-century-old-roast-beef self to The Mean Fiddler, where your fellow zombie lovers will be meeting from 6 to 8pm to feast on flesh—er, pub grub and drink specials—and get dolled up by zombie technicians (it’s free, but tips are appreciated).

Look out for ringleader Doug Sakmann, who will be decked out in a red and white striped jacket and ready to lead a spirited march of the living dead. The ghastly group will head over to the AMC Empire 25 theater (234 W 42nd St between Broadway and Eighth Ave, 212- 398-3939) at 9pm for the gratis screening. Leave the kiddies at home, though: The flick is rated R, and exceptions will not be made for under-17s, human or zombie.

While the get-together at the Mean Fiddler will help you get presentable, be prepared for some serious costumes. Sakmann suggests shredding up and bloodying old suits and dresses from thrift stores. “Our zombies are very creative, so a lot of people show up as a theme zombie. Zombie priests, pizza chefs and bunnies are just a few of the many great zombies we’ve seen over the years!”

As an added incentive to get zombified, crawl sponsor Halloween Adventure (104 Fourth Ave at 11th St; 212- 673-4546; newyorkcostumes.com) is offering 10 percent off makeup and prop purchases all year if you mention “Zombie Crawl.”—Sophie Friedman

Photo by Nate “Igor” Smith

A drawing from "Exquisite Corpse" by Juan Pablo Baene and Rachel Ostrow

Do you remember playing Consequences as a kiddywink? Where you would draw on a third of a piece of paper, fold the paper over so only the ends of your drawing were visible and pass it on for someone to continue the picture “blind.” Sure you do; there was a written version, too. What you probably didn’t know was that it was a favorite pastime of André Breton and his merry band of Surrealists. They termed it Exquisite Corpse after the first game they played resulted in the phrase “The exquisite corpse will drink the new wine” (in French, of course).

Tonight, the Gowanus Studio Space opens its free “Exquisite Corpse” exhibit at 7pm, the product of ten artists playing the game last night. And there’s a chance for you to be included in the exhibition as well. From 4:30 to 6pm you can play the game with the artists, and finished works will be hung for the reception tonight.

How did you learn to live in this wild and crazy metropolis? By taking up alcoholism as a hobby? By giving up “lunch” as a concept? Or maybe by realizing that when cabbies yell at you, you’re allowed to yell back?

There’s no doubt this is a city that taxes the mind and body at times, but that’s exactly why an evening titled How I Learned to Live in New York offers such an enticing promise of schadenfreude and hilarity. The event kicks off at 8pm at Happy Ending, and as with past installments of the monthly How I Learned series (topics have included breaking up, and laughing at humiliation), you can expect “invaluable life lessons against a dimly lit, self-indulgent, sexually tense and booze-fueled backdrop.”

Tonight’s world-weary storytellers include Paul Ford (Harper’s), Seth Herzog (Role Models) and Brooke Van Poppelen (from the blog NY Is Retarded). Alongside host Blaise Allysen Kearsley, they’ll tell tales of life in the city that will certainly amuse and potentially instruct. Like all life lessons worth a damn, this one’s free.