Last night (a few hours after my colleagues took the morning tour), I boarded the New York Water Taxi’s “unofficial” tour of the four cascades (the "official" honor goes to Circle Line Downtown), and got to see up close what the hullabaloo was all about.

 

Not much.

It’s not that I’m so particularly hard to impress when it comes to over-the-top civic stunts. After wondering what was the big deal about some orange flags, I found myself surprisingly moved by the collective awe and playfulness that The Gates inspired among New Yorkers in 2005. And to Christo and Jeanne-Claude’s credit, those Gates looked exactly the way they were dreamed up. Olafur Eliasson’s reality-to-imagination quotient isn’t nearly as high. The mock-ups distributed far and wide depict thick, roaring cascades—our own mini Niagaras. But in the light of day, 35,000 gallons of water never looked so measly. It’s as if Eliasson raised scaffolding—and very normal, unartistic scaffolding at that—in four places and just drizzled a bucket or two over them. I guess it is kinda cool the way the wind pushes around the sparse sheet of water, but my stoic heart remained unimpressed. The New York Water Taxi tour, however , is a fun bit of tourism for out-of-town guests. Our guide delivered most of his history-laden commentary in a mix of rap and poetry: “You see the buildings with the geometric tops? It’s the World Financial Center, and it’s one of New York Water Taxi’s stops.” Come on—that’s genius.