Back side: Friends-and-family menu

Front side: Same menu

This past Friday, The Feed was a guest at one of the vaunted friends-and-family dinners at the very hush-hush preopening of Graydon Carter’s revamped Monkey Bar. As we ambled toward the entry to the Hotel Elysée, we were surprised to find the doorman quite lax. “I’m here for friends-and-family” seemed to be the password.

Beyond the still-classic bar was a cadre of Carter-worthy staff (slim gal with a great haircut, a dapper Dan). Assisted by the warm lighting, red banquettes and palpable feeling of It status, the place did exude glamor. (The memory of the last incarnation, with its red-light chinoiserie, isn’t so hazy in The Feed’s mind; things, happily, have been returned to old New York form—even if that celebrity-cameo mural does look a bit nouveau.) Those in attendance were reliably of the mover-and-shaker variety (representing TV: the president of the Bravo network; representing artisan foods: Rick Field of Rick’s Picks).

As for the menu, the entirety of which you can see below (assume it’s a work-in-progress, and no, those prices do not apply to you), like our pals have reported in the not so distant past, it’s all about the classics (lobster Newburg, iceberg wedge salad, meat loaf), with some power-lunching favorites (yellowtail tartare, the ubiquitous beet and goat-cheese salad) thrown in for good measure.

The Feed nibbled here and there on nicely cooked lamb chops (protein only—sides come à la carte) presented institutional-dining style under a lusterless metal dome. Cedar-plank salmon, a New York strip steak, french fries, sautéed spinach, fondant-style mashed potatoes, a (wait for it, Cutlets) smoked bacon side—all quite simple, none up for judgment, in fairness, at this stage in the game. The most intriguing dish of the evening: black muscat Jell-O served with a pitcher of thick cream poured over it tableside. Oddly appealing, it melted in your mouth, functioning as one dining companion aptly described it, “like a Manischewitz palate cleanser.”

So when does the public get to sample the wares? According to our waiter, tomorrow could be the day, though The Feed had the good fortune of running into Graydon Carter on Saturday and asked the man himself. Said Graydon: “We’ll be open a week from Monday.” We’ll soon see!

Yes, this contraband menu was indeed smuggled out of the joint.