Online stalkers of me and my colleague Ben Kenigsberg, who’s currently at the Toronto Film Festival trying to avoid fistfights over Stephen Soderbergh’s Che with his colleagues, will recall a post we co-wrote earlier this year about Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles. I think Ben summed up our feelings about the show best when he said he was "skeptical, but…intrigued."

About two more episodes in, I stopped watching the first season. But some kind words about the pilot from the Tribune’s Maureen Ryan and the promise of a guest appearance by Garbage lead singer Shirley Manson (who could read the cereal box and mispronounce flour and still leave me enthralled) had me…well, intrigued.

And yet, I found less to like in this season’s premiere than I did in last’s. And re-reading my post now, some of the same problems I cited then are still…problems.

I’m putting my list of complaints after the jump since they’re rather spoiler-y if last night’s episode is still sitting unwatched on your Tivo.

1. The Terminator’s waist is the circumfrence of my thigh. Aside from a major casting change - which will never happen since this show’s marketing materials pretty much begin and end with Summer Glau’s naked, machine-parts-inflected torso - the lead Terminator in this show will always look like she’d blow over in a strong wind. It’s really just physics. Aside from the end, last night’s episode relied more on Glau’s ability to be a physical threat rather than an intellectual one. The former scenes usually work, the latter not so much. And by the way….

2. John Connor is more emo than Dawson Leery. I know part of the gist of this show is that we’re supposed to see an evolution of John from the whiny kid to John the badass, but I could do with fewer scenes like the one where he’s all emotionally-conflicted over yanking the kill switch out of the Terminator’s head, especially since she’s trying to kill him at the time. If the Terminator looked less like Summer Glau and more like, say, the late character actress Anne Ramsey then I bet he’d be a lot less "conflicted." And points off for the pseudo-buzz cut at the end. It’s not so much "hardened soul" as it is "rakishly handsome." Speaking of the Connors…

3. Sarah Connor doesn’t have enough to do. I have to admit, seeing someone drive a truck through a wall like she did in last night’s episode, is always fun to watch. But come on! Her name is in the title! Thanks to dialogue like variations on "Are you all right?", she’s got a less interesting storyline than her ex. And on a related note…

4. The male supporting characters are the most interesting. I hated 90210, but all I can think is "Why don’t more shows have Brian Austin Green on them?" He’s like a tougher version of Michael DeLuise. (Uh, that’s a compliment. he plays a great mook.) Plus, Dean Winters and Richard T. Jones? What can I say, I enjoy reluctant heroes. Please, someone write a good female foil for this show. Next week’s love interest for John won’t solve this problem. And speaking of female characters…

5. The head of Cyberdyne should not be a Terminator. Not to get all deep about a series which should really be about blowing shit up, but one of the themes of the Terminator series is man’s hubris. If it turns out that the person who was ultimately responsible for the rise of the machine was a machine, that makes the whole thing a little less tragic. And interesting.

Also, if there isn’t already some gender studies student writing a post on a blog somewhere about the scene where Shirley Manson’s character morphs from an about-to-be-peed-on urinal into a killing machine then I am disappointed in this country’s post-graduate university programs. Seriously, what’s with this show and women?

Anyway, that’s my list. Feel free to refute it in comments. I’ll stick with it for a couple more episodes, but I’m not holding out much hope.